Couples remain under same roof or delay official divorce due to cost-of-living pressures
ABC Wide Bay By Nikki Sorbello
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In short:
Separating couples are choosing to delay their official divorce due to financial concerns.
Many people remain living under the same roof while separated, which may add cost to the process.
What’s next?
Experts say having paperwork in order and seeking advice early will make divorce as cost effective as possible.
After more than a decade of being legally married, Sandra* says she is finally free.
The 57-year-old Gold Coast woman escaped an abusive relationship in 2016 with her daughter and a few belongings, and later took out a domestic violence order (DVO).
It took her three years to finalise her divorce last month.
“I have a new lease on life knowing that we are finally safe,” Sandra said.
“It’s given me more strength than I thought I had.”
For Sandra, getting a divorce was important because remaining legally married to her now ex-husband had made her feel “disgusted, humiliated, and sad”.
It cost her $1,200 in fees and charges, and because she does not work it has taken her a long time to save the money.
“My vertigo has gone through the roof stressing on how I [was] going to pay this money,” she said.
Filing for divorce
Dissolving marriages comes under the jurisdiction of the Federal Circuit and Family Court of Australia.
Applications can be lodged solely or jointly with the separated spouse.
A $1,100 court fee is payable, but some applicants like Sandra are eligible for a reduction — for example, those on a health care card or suffering financial hardship.
If children, joint finances, debt, or property are involved the process becomes more complicated and expensive.
Gail, 73, is living proof that age matters when it comes to divorce
Applicants are strongly advised to seek legal advice, which can also add to the cost.
Sandra chose to go through an online legal service and her $1,200 bill included the concessional court fee, a fee to track down her former husband, as well as legal fees.
To afford it she paid it off in fortnightly instalments when she could.
“This entails not eating,” she said.
“I have to give my daughter food because she’s a 15-year-old. But I’m in my 50s, I can deal with not eating for four days.
“I was determined to get it done … but I feel very sorry for the women that don’t have the strength.”
A ‘discretionary spend’
Bundaberg-based solicitor Geoff Ebert, whose firm managed Sandra’s divorce, said divorce was becoming a “discretionary spend” amid the cost-of-living crisis.
“Once people understand the cost it might be that they have to kick the divorce down the road for six months because they’ve got rates to pay and electricity to pay,” Mr Ebert said.
“We’re seeing a lot of couples separate but continue to live under the same roof.
“There’s a lose-lose in the sense that you’re still needing to live together, and then it costs you even more to get divorced because there’s more paperwork that has to be generated.”
Keeping costs down
Divorce rates in Australia hit a peak in 2021 with 56,244 finalised, partly due to administrative changes that helped clear a pandemic backlog.
But the overall divorce rate has been trending downwards since the 1990s, according to the Australian Institute of Family Studies.
In 2022, Australian Bureau of Statistics data shows 49,241 divorces were formalised.
Family and domestic violence support services:
If you need help immediately call emergency services on triple-0
- 1800 Respect National Helpline: 1800 737 732
- Women’s Crisis Line: 1800 811 811
- Men’s Referral Service: 1300 766 491
- Lifeline: 131 114
Danielle Bozin from Queensland University of Technology’s School of Law said the data did not capture the finalisation of de facto separations, which had similar financial costs.
Dr Bozin said most family law disputes were settled through negotiation or mediation and the legal system was designed to encourage that.
“If people end up going further into the court system and have to go to final hearing they are looking at in excess of $30,000,” she said.
The deputy president of the Queensland Law Society, Genevieve Dee, said cost pressures in separation and divorce were much more prevalent than “five or 10 years ago because money isn’t as readily available”.
“So, you will see people often engaged in very lengthy negotiations which often can be counterintuitive to what you’re trying to do, which is save money,” Ms Dee said.
Get your paperwork in order
When it comes to making divorce as cost effective as possible, all three legal experts say preparation and paperwork are paramount.
“‘Do I have evidence of the separation if I need to? Do I have my marriage certificate, photographic ID, or passports to show you are an Australian citizen?’,” Mr Ebert said.
People can seek free advice and information through community legal centres, Legal Aid Commissions, the national Family Relationship Advice service, or pay for a private lawyer.
“Early advice is helpful for people to understand the length of time the process is going to take, the likely cost of the process, and decisions they can make early on to try and keep that matter out of litigation — which is the most costly part of separation,” Ms Dee said.
Sandra said going through a lengthy divorce process added to the trauma from the abuse.
“It’s like a big washing machine on the never-ending cycle,” she said.
Now on the other side, Sandra is proud to have had the strength and support to persevere.
“I am healing and we have survived,” she said.
*Sandra’s name has been changed to protect her privacy.
More than 80 per cent of cases in the family court involve allegations of family violence. Are you one of them?
The ABC would like to hear from anyone over 16 who has been through the family court system.
You can share your stories with us by emailing: SRTcourt@abc.net.au
Please note: No information will be shared with third parties. The ABC upholds Section 121 of the Family Law Act prohibiting the identification of any parties in a family law matter.